How does it feel when your love towards the opposite sex is termed “Puppy love”?

I met Claire during my paramilitary service. Pointed nose, full dark hair, fair and elegant, attractive smiles and sweet; I made up my mind not to enter into a relationship especially when I couldn’t get what I wanted but in  her, I found nothing than the fact that my soul told me I have found someone I love in all honesty.

Have gone about two years from breaking up with my ex (she broke up with me), though she was my first girlfriend and

After the break up, I decided not to get myself attached with anything relationship.

But hey meeting Claire open my eyes to the reality that I never truly loved my ex and it was something good for her to break up with me. I forgave myself and my Ex; decided to move on with Claire since what I felt for her was different from what have ever felt in a relationship.

Those journeys of love with Claire were so beautiful and have never gone through such journey in my previous relationship.

Had the chance to go on a bicycle ride with her,

we always take a walk every evening

I spent half of my day with her and all we do was to cook and gist

we have this way of throwing jabs at each other while we laugh at them.

Everything about us was so beautiful that our colleagues became so jealous of our relationship and some wished they had something like that. All this while, I never told her about my feelings. I got to know later as we move on that Claire has a fiancée who has even given her a ring and he is someone well known to her family. How did I get to know?

It was on a beautiful afternoon, and I decided to tell Claire my feelings for her and how I kept it for some time till I could find the courage to let her know.  On that fateful day, she was busy in the kitchen trying to prepare spaghetti though I thought it was the usual way whereby she cooks in the afternoon so we can share the meal together.

After she was done preparing the meal, I told her hostel mate that I wanted to get something from my hostel and once am back I would share something with her which I would tell Claire later as well.

Riding back from my hostel, I saw a black Toyota parked at the front of her hostel; I never imagined that it was a visitor she was expecting, I got into her apartment and then saw two middle aged men sitting in her room, one sat on the bed while the other sat on a plastic chair she has at the corner of her room. I greeted them and then left for my friend’s room. On getting to TK’s room, he told me about the guy and who he was to Claire.

Been unable to control my feelings, I left her hostel that day and decided to kill off any feelings I have for her and also let go of our memories.

At the end of it all, I got to discover that Claire also has a place for me in her heart. I decided to give it a shot again and continue going along with her till I can finally open up to her again about the love I have for her.

It was finally time for me to be discharged from my compulsory national service which means leaving the community I served at as soon as I get my discharged certificate.

Claire begged me to stay with her for just few weeks after the end of my service of which I declined due to the fact that I wasn’t stable financially to keep taking care of myself as my monthly allowances has been cut off and I was also no healthy.

I never told her the reasons and she actually thought I intentionally wanted to go without having anything for her or my friends.

We still talked while I was at home and maybe I should say our feelings for each other grew stronger by then and she could finally not control what she had for me. I get calls from her and at the end she would always tell me she loves me. I couldn’t control my joy when she first told me such words and I told myself that finally I am fully in love with someone my heart chooses. She called me and asked me twice (different days) if we could get married of which I replied her by saying yes we can.

Got to later know that we share the same ideology when it comes to life, religion, relationship, finances etc.

I made her cry while she also brought tears from my eye which is bound to happen in a relationship.

Then, i noticed some changes when she stopped using the “I love you” word at the end of our conversation and whenever I tried saying such to her, she would reply with the words “Thank You”.

Then I knew something is going on of which she never wanted to tell me anything till I pressured the words from her mouth. She sent me a message on WhatsApp that says she wants to put a restraint on our conversation and relationship. I then asked why and she replied by saying she doesn’t want to give me false hope and that people say we talk like lovers. I was shocked and then asked her if truly what she had for me was false. She then replied by saying what we had was just “PUPPY LOVE”.

It was actually the first day I heard such term and then I searched for it only to get the meaning that it was all infatuation.

Deep within myself I knew what I had for her been true and can’t believe she categorized our relationship as a puppy relationship. It hurt me and for about two years I couldn’t get out of it. All she tells me was that I would meet someone that deserves me.

She tagged our relationship as a puppy relationship.